When team connections come second ...

A team session is by definition focusing on the team interactions. During the day, the team members discuss in pairs or triads or with the entire group. All energy is spent on the exchanges, questioning, listening and then creating together. The team really feels like a team !

Why does this energy or momentum quickly dissipate after the team session ? Why does the team feel less like a team ?

Our brain has limited energy. During the team session, all energy is focused exclusively on the team interactions. Outside of the team session, each team member falls back on dealing with the different daily challenges and priorities that come their way. This can be under the form of meetings, calls, emails or reviews. The brain focuses its energy on solving the problems, finding solutions, explaining, negotiating or justifying. Not much energy is left for taking care of the interactions and relations within the team.

I recently experienced this is an interesting way. A large group of people is asked to walk around in a room, and interact with the others (eye contact, saying "hello"). The team members at first get simple instructions (start, stop, call out your name, clap ...) but these get more and more complex (when hearing "clap", say out your name, and "stop" means start). At the start there was a buzz when people walked around and interacted with the others in the room. In only a few minutes' time, the buzz disappeared, eyes were focusing on the floor, and each member of the group was spending all the energy on complying with the complex instructions. No energy was left to spend on interacting with the others in the room.

The key take-away: you need to deliberately carve out time to to grow your team, every day. The team session can give a good boost but without regular team reboots, not much will be built up.

The 4 things successful leaders never do at 7:30 in the morning

Well, sorry to have tricked you with the title. I don't have a clue what successful leaders do, or not do, at 7:30 in the morning. Or at any time during the day for that matter. Yet I see about a dozen blogs or postings left and right every day that seem to promise instant gratification if only we mere mortals could copy this or that habit that successful leaders apparently have. And guess who writes these blogs and postings ... Do you think it is the successful leaders who sit down and share their secrets to success ? Hmm ... most often it is not.

I have studied the history of leadership extensively for an executive leadership program. Over the years, a lot of interesting models and views about leadership have been developed. Yet none of these leadership models have been universally validated as holding the secrets to sustained and successful leadership.

For those who are interested in developing their leadership and who are in search of the holy grail, the following reality check is the best advice I can share:

"The search for the universally correct leadership style is doomed to failure because of cultural variation by country, by industry, by occupation, by the particular history of a given organization, and, most importantly, by the actual task to be performed." from Edgar Schein in Organizational Culture and Leadership (4th edition), page 166.

So rather than try and find out what you are supposed to do or not to do at 7:30 in the morning, work with what you have: yourself and the people surrounding you. Try and improve something you do every day. Ask for feedback and reflect honestly on how you are doing. That is probably going to take you further than digging for secret leadership formulas will !

Learning by doing is not enough

We all know the saying that we learn by doing, not by sitting to listen to a lecture. And it's not just a saying, research has confirmed this (see the picture). Real learning happens only when we do stuff.\

Have you ever spent a full day doing plenty of stuff ... ? For sure you have. Meetings, reviews, phone calls, discussions, preparing a presentation, dealing with all the emails that pop up without interruption. So much doing, the whole day long ! With hardly time to breathe in between these events. Lunch lasts about 20 minutes, or happens at your desk, doing some more email stuff. So on your way home, at then end of that busy day where you did so much, what was playing in your mind ? Were you telling yourself "Wow, so a great day full of learning by doing !". Probably not. It was more something like "Thank God this day is over and done with !". So there was all that doing, but apparently no learning ? What is missing to turn doing into real learning ?

Doing requires an external focus. And thinking or reflecting brings an internal focus. Recent research lead by HBR has shown that the internal focus, of thinking or reflecting, increases the learning retention by up to 22%. How do you bring this internal focus into a busy day of doing ? The key trick is to use questions ! Spending some time at the end of a day, or better still, at different times during the day, to ask yourself a few questions, makes all the difference. Questions such as ... How was this meeting ? Did we achieve the objectives ? How was the team dynamic ? What was the quality of the decisions we took ? How was this meeting different from the one before ? These simple questions and the reflection that follows them, are where the doing gets transformed into learning. Reflecting on what we did, why things happened they way they happened, is where the learning happens, not just in the doing part.

Now all this thinking and reflecting does not need to take more than 5 minutes, so "We are really so busy" is not a valid excuse ! And if you skip the reflection part, you will just move from doing lots of stuff one day, to doing even more stuff the next day. Train yourself to reflect and help yourself learn on how to grow. Even on a busy day.

Who's your god ?

Saraswati

No, I am not going off on a new tangent in my blog ... But I was recently in India for the Global Forum of the World Institute of Action Learning. A very dynamic and enjoyable 3 days of intense learning.

Fittingly, the event was kicked off by lighting the lamp of learning, and making reference to Saraswati, the goddess of knowledge, creativity, education and eloquence. She endows human beings with the powers of speech, wisdom and learning. She has four hands, and these represent the four aspects of human personality in learning: mind, intellect, alertness and ego.

Who is your god ? I discovered in India that there are 33 million gods and mustis to chose from (although that number is challenged by some if you look for information on the topic) ! Some gods go well with others, but some don't mix. The gods in India represent more values and traits than purely religious aspects. So which ones are your gods ? What are your values in life ?

Mike Marquardt, assisted by
Sripriyaa V., lighting
the lamp of learning

Values are an often-discussed concept, yet people mostly don't spend the time to reflect on what is really important for them. I once came across a 'card game' with each card representing a value, with the target is to rank and sort and finally conclude which 3 or maximum 5 of the cards represent those values that are really critical for you. Not easy but it does trigger meaningful thinking. I really recommend you to do the exercise, or any form thereof. This is not something to be shared with anyone, but taking the effort to determine what are the important values in your life is a valuable exercise.

We often talk about company values, and how these are important when it comes to recruiting or engaging people. But company values are only meaningful if they can be compared to your personal values. There is no such thing as good or bad values. There is only those that are meaningful or less so, for each one of us.

So take the time to determine - if only for yourself - which of the 33 million gods are important to you !

Who inspires you ?

Are you inspired by the stream of "inspirational quotes" that seems to inundate Linkedin or Facebook every minute of the day ? Do you "like" these sources of inspiration ? From the sheer volume of inspiration that is around, one would believe we live in a very inspiring and inspired world. But the concept of inspiration seems to have lost part of its meaning. The definition of inspiration is ...

something that makes someone want to do something or that gives someone an idea about what to do or create

So what do you actually DO when you "like" an inspirational quote ? Or when you read the leadership quotes from Abraham Lincoln ? Or see the movie of Ghandi's life ? What do you DO with this apparent inspiration ? Most of the ACTIONS around inspiration seem limited to "likes" and "shares" on social media. Widely spreading the inspiration around ... ! But what about actually doing something from that inspiration ?

I am not inspired by Ghandi, Mandela, Richard Branson or Steve Jobs. All cool guys, without a doubt, but I never met them and never will. And reading books or quotes does not turn me into one of them. I am not inspired because although I do read about them, that does not translate into me taking any particular action.

I am inspired by people I know, and meet or work with regularly. I am inspired by the server in the hotel last week who remembered what my favorite dessert is. She inspired me to look out in more detail for the individual needs of the participants in my workshop. I am inspired by the colleague who gave a presentation and handled a tough question really well. He inspired me to prepare better my next presentation and try to imagine what the audience would think or ask. Or the motorcycle taxi driver who seemed like the happiest guy despite spending his day in heat and pollution. He inspired me to try and smile a bit more often !

Inspirational quote of the day: look for inspiration around you, it might just be easier to act on !

Questions to ... yourself !

I read a lot. I read all the time. Mostly books around leadership and management and approaches on how to make teams more effective. But I have to admit that very few books really stand out: it is very often a nice idea spread over 300 pages. And if I'm honest, I also have to admit that it is very rare that I read something that really stays with me, and that I apply going forward. The last time that happened was when I read "Time Management for Dummies" and became addicted to creating and re-updating "to-do lists". This was a long time ago, but it stuck and to-do lists are still very much a key element of how I remain organized.

So I was not expecting a lot when I recently started Marilyn Adam's book "Change Your Questions, Change Your Life". First of all, it's a management book written in novel style, and I really don't like that. As I started, I thought it would be another book about asking good questions and getting the best out of people.

But they key insight for me was not about what questions to ask to others, but what questions to ask to yourself ! In particular in tense or difficult situations, situations where we sometimes give priority to what to say rather than to thinking about the best answer. Asking a question to yourself creates a space for reflection. It is really different that "talking to yourself" because asking a question gives you the choice of answers, while talking to yourself is more descriptive.

And I have to say that this idea of asking a question to myself has for some reason really stuck. I find myself easily asking MYSELF a question, when faced with a particular challenge or difficult situation. This happens very quickly, it's just a second or so, but creating the mental "pause" under the form of a question allows to look at options. Rather than diving in with the first response or intuition that comes to mind, asking a question, thinking about options and then taking the next step is really powerful. I have found it extremely easy to actually apply that several times per day.

Next time you are faced with a challenge, a difficulty, a tense situation, ask yourself a question. "What could be another explanation ?", "What would really be the best next step here ?". No need to rack your brain for the perfect question: just creating the pause and scanning the few options before moving ahead has helped me take better next steps. I am happy I didn't put the book aside !

Is your team brain-dead ?

It is commonly said that we use only 10% of our brain. Although the biological facts are a bit different, it remains pretty much accepted that there is much more potential for using this phenomenal tool to its full capability. Consultants and trainers will explain that they will unlock the remaining 90% of your team's brain power, and your performance will go through the roof.

Back to reality.

Working with a team on an organizational challenge, we arrived at the team debrief after the third working session. The three sessions had been intense but rich in discovery and learning. During this third session, the team had agreed on a shared understanding of the root cause of the challenge. The team was making good progress and had started to identify very interesting solutions to this problem (of which the sponsor had said "it exists since the company was founded 43 years ago !"). Towards the end of the session, I asked each member around the table to share "how they were feeling ?". Replies were varied. One member said ...

"I feel tired. I have never been doing so much thinking. In my normal working days, I get by doing this and that, some routine stuff, pretty much switching my brain off ... I feel tired from thinking." 

There was no stunned silence or gasps of shock around the table. It was more like mumbles and smiles ... Everyone recognized themselves in this description. This was not a group of assembly-line operators or laborers. These were so-called knowledge workers, supervisors and support staff whose job it is to solve problems, come up with solutions on a daily basis and who lead themselves teams. 

I don't think they are lazy. Or enjoy "switching their brains off". In fact, they had simply never been asked to switch their brains on !

Before attempting to tap into the 'unused' part of your team's brains with a fancy training session, ask yourself what you do to encourage your team to use their brain. For real. Giving them a problem and telling them it is their task to solve it. And then stick with this when they tell you they are stuck. 10% of brain power is in fact more than enough. If it is switched on at least once in a while.

Happy out of your comfort zone

At the end of a recent week-long leadership development program with a group of engineering managers in Singapore, the participants were asked to share one key thought or take-away for the intense week. One of the participants shared ...

"I have come to realize that, if you are pushed often enough out of your comfort zone, you can actually get used to it."

This is a thought that stuck with me. In several leadership development programs, I have seen participants who become very aware about themselves, and get a good understanding of what their own comfort zone is. Awareness is of course the necessary condition towards progress.

But while many understand the concept - and manage to apply it to themselves - pretty well ... the majority still struggle to do anything with this new awareness. As if they now have a good understanding of their own challenges, but remain stuck like a deer staring into the headlights.

So once you are aware of your own comfort zone, what's next ? My personal experience is that it helps to see the situations where you are moving out of your comfort zone, as ... learning opportunities. Not performance opportunities. Not opportunities to show to yourself, or someone else, what you can do (because you can't !). Just learning opportunities. If you can develop your mindset that these situations help you to learn, then the experience becomes far less stressful. And any of these experiences helps to learn more about yourself. Maybe learning that getting out of that comfort zone was easier, or harder, than you thought. It is not about doing it right. It is not about trying to copy what the others (the experts) do. I try to reflect out loud (in my head !) what I am learning, what is going better than thought, or what is not going really well and I would do differently next time. I try to keep myself in the learning mode.

Developing a mindset of learning, when faced with out-of-comfort-zone situations, goes a long way in becoming happy being out of your comfort zone.

There is no such thing as "the great question"

We all know the value of asking questions, rather than giving the answers (although the application of this principle may be more difficult). I am often asked "how do you ask a good question ?". There are blogs and even books that are written about "good questions" to ask. People make lists of the "top 10 questions" to ask in a coaching session.

This is pretty silly. There is no such thing as a good question, in absolute terms. My definition of a good question is a question that makes the other(s) think, and that this thinking leads to insights or breakthrough ideas. It is not about who asks the smartest question in the room. It is about what is the best question, for a particular context, at that particular time.

We recently ran an Action Learning session where one of the participants shared the concern she had about the motivation of her team members, given the fact that all of them had been working long hours for several months. She had brooded about this issue for quite some time and considered she was stuck.

If the participants in the session had read the books on asking good questions, they probably would have asked questions like "Why is this important for you ?" or "What would you do if there were no constraints ?". Great, open-ended and thought provoking questions ... in some circumstances. Instead, someone asked "Have you asked your team members what they think about this ?". "Of course" the problem presenter said "I don't know why I just think about this by myself without asking them what they think !". She explained that she had a very good relation with the team members, and that they often had lunch together and talked about everything ... except this issue. This was the end of the session ! The light bulb had gone off in the problem presenter's head. You might argue that it is rather basic to check with the other team members ... Well, maybe it is basic. For you. But that was not the case for her.

There are no rules for what makes a great question. The great question is the one that gets the light bulb going ... in the OTHER person's head, not in your's ! It depends on the other person, the context, and the particular moment in time. The next great question is not listed somewhere in a book ...

Focus anybody ?

Daniel Goleman's (emotional intelligence) recent book is titled "Focus, the hidden driver of excellence". There are different levels of focus, but what I am interested in is the focus that exists (or is missing !) in a team.


Have you recently addressed your team (either those reporting to you, or a team of your peers), making a presentation about last year's results or this year's priorities ? Of course, when you make your presentation, you are concentrating on what you are saying, ensuring your message is clear and well understood. But have you ever tried - not easy, as you are presenting at the same time - to observe who is really listening ? Very often, some start to peek at their cell phone for the latest emails. And yet more often, distraction is not noticeable ... People can be nodding or staring at you and yet they think about something completely different. In larger groups, the challenge is even more important. A one-hour presentation by the CEO to the entire workforce is often the opportunity for some unnoticed Facebook time (for the audience that is, not for the CEO !).

More and more knowledge workers spend their working hours on a computer. As one of my Linkedin contacts recently admitted "I was looking for a piece of information on the Internet and ended up spending one hour watching Youtube videos !" Judging from the postings and likes on Facebook, many people I know spend a good portion of their day making sure they have not missed any important update on their social network ! Distractions are abound, and in my view have become a major challenge for productivity in organizations. A few years ago, blocking access to social media sites was a partial solution. But smart phones and fast networks make for a very good alternative !


How can you ensure that your people are working to solve your organization's challenges ? How can you ensure their minds don't wander off all the time ?

The most simple way is to ... stop talking. Ask someone a question, and wait for their reply. And then follow up their reply with another question, not your thoughts on what they just said. And then another question. When you ask someone a question, a very simple yet powerful thing happens: people think (because you are waiting for an answer). When people think and are actively engaged in the exchange with you, they will not wander off and get distracted. They are actually using their brains to think and solve the challenge you offer them. Action Learning allows you to apply this principle to a group setting. I have observed groups addressing an important business problem, for nearly 3 hours. There was no Powerpoint presentation, and nobody told the others what the solution was. People only asked questions to one another. The level of concentration and focus is very powerful. When you have a group of people engaging with each other, building on each other's ideas, intensely for 3 hours, the output of the session is so different from any regular meeting. One of the most frequent comments from a group that has experienced their first Action Learning session is "If only all our meetings could be run like this !"

Don't try to fight Facebook distractions: you'll lose ! Instead, engage your team, give them a challenge and ensure they ask questions to each other. Minds don't wander off when questions are being asked ... ! And the brain is still a pretty powerful tool to look for solutions.

When was the last time you asked your team to reflect ?

In a recent McKinsey article on the challenges around leadership development, the authors write that one issue is that reflection (learning) is often disconnected from the 'real work'. Learning and reflection happens in the training room, or in the off-site development program, or in the MBA program. In the office, we ... work ! And there are so many important priorities to deal with that we do not really have much time to go for training sessions. And we all know that, for all the reflection and thinking that goes on in a training room, very few can actually apply their new learning in their working environment. The challenge is combining this learning and reflection, with 'real work'.

Any leader would agree that learning is important. Organizations and teams need to learn to better deal with the more and more complex business challenges of our time. Most often we assume that people learn by doing stuff, like new assignments or projects. Trying out new things is important, but a key variable in how humans learn is the way they reflect about what they have been doing. Is this similar to what I know ? What is different ? Where else is this new experience applicable ? Learning really only happens when reflection is added to the experience. Otherwise we are stuck in the treadmill-like cycle of doing things and then doing some more things.

How and where does reflection happen ? We often assume that it happens somewhere "in people's heads", more or less automatically, like breathing. Either while they work or when they drive home. In some cases, this might be true, but for sure leaving it up to each individual to 'think' about their learning is limited. Reflection is sometimes associated with 'doing nothing' or daydreaming, because indeed, it does involve silence.

Action Learning does assume that reflection happens by itself. In an Action Learning setting, reflecting on what each individual, as well as the group, has experienced is made explicit. It is each time very powerful to go around the group and ask each member what they have learned, how they see this experience, or how it changes their view on things.

When is the last time you asked your team to reflect on something, and asked them to share what they had learned ? Try it - allow for some silence - and you might be surprised about the quality of what they share.

Questions in action

Need inspiration for asking questions that help your team members think for themselves and take ownership of the issues ? Take a look at how Meg Whitman (CEO at HP) challenges her team ... with questions.

Meg Whitman has questions (from Forbes Asia June 2013)

Chasing monkeys

I often come across business leaders who explain how unhappy they are with their team's or with some individual's performance. When I ask for an example, the reply is typically of the same nature. They describe a situation or event, and explain how the team member either didn't react/reply/propose at all, or reacted/replied/proposed in a way that was considered wrong (by the business leader). And invariably, the next step they describe is the same: they explain to the team member what he/she should do or should have done, and demonstrate it to be sure the message is clearly received.

So let's reflect now on what the team member is taking away from this ... For one, it confirms that the leader has the answer, and the correct answer at that. Second, the team member thinks that the issue has been resolved in a rather satisfactory way, because the leader is getting the result he wants. Lesson learned ? Next time, don't do anything (the leader will take the issue on) or ask the leader what to do (he will demonstrate for sure what to do). Win-win !

Business leaders often think they "teach" or share their knowledge by showing what should be done. Leading by example is great but leading by handing out the "right" solutions is not helping your team. What to do instead ? Ask them questions ... Not questions like "Why don't you do  it this way ?" which is an implicit solution, but genuine questions that make your team member think. And once they start thinking ... stop ! Let them think, and react, and adapt what they are doing. If they don't act on their thinking, they are not learning, and you are probably wasting your time with them (as they are with you). If they do, they are learning and they will address future issues with a higher level of experience.  

Stop chasing the monkeys. You may think you are solving problems (and you are) but you are stopping your people from thinking, learning and growing. And there's too many monkeys to fit on your shoulders, however broad these are, anyway !

Talking with meaning

I have been in numerous meetings. When there’s a majority of non-Asians in the room, it often comes down to who talks the most. Those that do most of the talking are seen as the most knowledgeable, or the most assertive, and the rest either struggle to keep up or switch off. I used to do this for quite a while,  making sure my voice was heard. But as I moved up in the organization, I realized that when I did all the talking, I was not getting a lot from the team that works with me. So what’s the solution ? Say nothing at all ? No, the solution is to consider the quality of your interventions, rather than the quantity. I have two tips I picked up along the way worth sharing. The first I heard from someone somewhere, I don’t remember where. The second is something that grew as an awareness over the years.

Tip #1 When in a discussion or debate, think before you are about to say something, and answer the question: is what I am about going to say making a contribution in bringing this discussion closer to a solution or outcome, or is it helping the team forward ? If not, don’t say anything and continue to listen to the others. If you are sure that what you are about to say is helping the team, go ahead and say what you have to say. If you apply this rule, you will find out that you will be speaking much less often. This is because we often speak because we want to show others what we know about the issue at hand. Or we repeat what someone else has said, but in our words and with a slight twist. Or we disagree with someone and elaborate on why that person is wrong. We speak up to be heard, to be listened to, and we think that this is how we contribute. But what we are saying is quite often just filling the space, and not helping to solve the issue that is being discussed.

Tip #2 Listen for what is not being said, and fill that gap. In a team discussion or meeting, ideas and opinions fly left and right. Someone says something and the topic is taken up, twisted, reshaped or attacked. Somebody else will continue in the same direction or move the discussion in a different one. Very often a discussion builds on what is the last thing that was said. While all this is going on, try to become, for a few seconds, an observer to the meeting, and ask yourself the question: what is not being discussed ? What is the team not talking about ? A powerful question like “Have you guys thought about this or that ?” can change the course of a discussion and speed up the resolution.  

When in meetings or team discussion, think about the quality of your contributions and not of the quantity. When you speak less frequently, but with something meaningful to say, it carries weight and is seen as more positive than just filling the empty space. It is one of the qualities of becoming a leader.

Thinking ...

I watched The Iron Lady on a recent flight to Bangalore. Brilliant movie around the intriguing personality of Margaret Thatcher (played by Meryl Streep). Love her or hate her, she was a character and several of her quotes are still being used today. There was a specific exchange, where the ageing Baroness Thatcher (born in 1925, still alive today), suffering from hallucinations about her diseased husband, is being examined by her doctor (from www.twcguilds.com/assets/screenplay/the-iron-lady.pdf).

DOCTOR

Still it must be a bit disorientating. You are bound to be feeling.

MARGARET

 What? What am I ‘bound to be feeling’?

 

The DOCTOR looks up from his note taking, hearing the quiet challenge in MARGARET’s voice.

 

MARGARET (CONT’D)

People don’t ‘think’ any more. They ‘feel’. ‘How are you feeling?’ ‘Oh I don’t feel comfortable with that’ ‘Oh, I’m so sorry but we, the group were feeling...’ D’you know, one of the great problems of our age is that we are governed by people who care more about feelings than thoughts and ideas. Now thoughts and ideas. That interests me. Ask me what I am thinking

 

The DOCTOR hesitates, letting MARGARET settle until

 

DOCTOR

What are you thinking, Margaret?

 

MARGARET looks at the DOCTOR, quietly struggling with a fury, threatening to unleash

 

MARGARET

 Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Watch your words, for they become actions. Watch your actions, for they become habits. Watch your habits, for they become your character. And watch your character, for it becomes your destiny. What we think, we become. My father always said that. And I think I am fine. But I do so appreciate your kind concern.

 

 

 

The Thinker (1902), Rodin

From Wikipedia.org, thinking, or thought, generally refers to any mental or intellectual activity involving an individual's subjective consciousness. It can refer either to the act of thinking or the resulting ideas or arrangements of ideas. Thinking allows beings to make sense of or model the world in different ways, and to represent or interpret it in ways that are significant to them, or which accord with their needs, attachments, objectivces, plans, commitments, ends and desires.

What we think, we become. So what have YOU been thinking about lately ? I mean thinking. Not emailing. Or tweeting. Not SMS-ing or Facebook-ing. No, not all that. But thinking. Do you actually know what you have been thinking about ? You'd better, because if She is correct, it is what you will become.